The Falsehood of Feminine Submission

When I came onto the feminine/masculine scene in 2017/2018, there was a lot of talk about feminine submission to the masculine.

As a woman who had a lot of experience both professionally and in my marriage as having to "be masculine," this idea made sense to me in that a woman doesn't need to be more masculine than the man, or dominate decision making, etc. I also realize that women who are carrying trauma in their bodies (hi, all of us) do have protective mechanisms that lead her to try to control situations, and submission or surrender are sometimes medicinal energetics to try on.

I wanted to exhale, relax, and receive from a man who wanted to be with me in this way.

So I tried it out. I got myself into a high-risk scenario dating a married man who was separated from his wife. Also, they had come to me for support with their marriage, so the fact that I agreed to be in this relationship with him before he'd fully cleaned that up just goes to show that my shadow was also involved.

I watched him try to navigate this situation and while he really wanted to be a big man and care for everyone, in the end, I was dropped. Hard.

And what I had been doing was letting him lead, letting him decide, putting my belief and faith in him, saying yes to risk without commitment or safety.

I surrendered things I shouldn't have surrendered. And it wasn't magic. It was a mistake.

I tell you this tiny version of the story to say - feminine submission alone landed me in a really, really hard place when it didn't work out. That was my lesson that this idea, popular in theory on the internet, wasn't the answer. That you couldn't follow, submit, or surrender to a man who had not yet done his own work to erect himself in Feminine Masculine Union under a Unified Godhead.

But I didn't have those words yet.

Teachers of feminine submission:

There was a teacher of feminine submission in the online space that I "followed" (aka observed) for a few years. I genuinely like her as a human and feel a sisterly connection to her, though I no longer know her or her work because I stepped away from it.

Something about it didn't sit right with me. I observed all these women flocking to her, paying her big money, sitting at her feet, but something in my soul told me to be cautious. The teachings were perhaps valid, but they weren't Truth with a capital T.

She taught feminine submission to the masculine, but she didn't talk about the template of the masculine. She didn't discern about whether that man had unresolved trauma or mother wounding, whether he had entities or served a unified God.

She was teaching women how to behave in order exalt men and masculine, and pretty much contort in order to receive from them.

When someone asked me what I thought of her new relationship at one point, I said, "I'm afraid she is going to get seriously hurt."

I now will confidently state that I believe that these teachings about feminine submission hurt many women where they are trying to help.

A history of men at the center:

What got me thinking about this this morning is that someone asked me if my upcoming women's group, Re*Source, would focus on how to get men to practice right reciprocity.

To this I say - there is only one good, honest, and true way to "get" men to do anything. And that is, to fully erect the sovereignty of your heart-centered feminine nature, value yourself and your resources fully, and watch how men and masculine respond.

Do nothing so that men respond in a certain kind of way.

Reclaim your own feminine and masculine, your own relationship to Mother Father God, heal every distortion that you can between yourself and a graceful heart, and walk the path that you were meant to walk.

This is the formula for Divine Union.

Two people, each sovereign unto Mother Father God, choosing to be in partnership. It's actually pretty simple.

Submission and Sacred Feminine Arts:

I imagine that there is not one woman under the sun who has actually done what I've just described that would then also need to practice feminine submission.

A graceful woman is going to naturally bend to a God-led man in just the right ways and will welcome his leadership when it is trustworthy. She doesn't need to "practice" submission, rather she embodies the art of being feminine in relation to a masculine man.

And she'll also challenge him, stand in her own authority, and speak her wisdom to him. And, if he is a man worth having a position in her life, he will honor her feedback, wisdom, embodied knowing and words.

Both have leadership. It's not a power play.

Feminine submission and surrender polarity teachings are in their own way attempting to patch up the heaps of historic imbalances between feminine and masculine, but they fall short primarily because the template is not relying on actual unity. There is a template of actual unity, and it's not in dom/sub culture.

The responsibility of feminine power:

There is an art and a sacred responsibility to being a Woman, and part of that sacred responsibility is to lead your own life in your own sovereign power.

Not behaving in ways so as to get a man to do anything, not turning down your magic to keep a man happy, not contorting who you are to be provided for, not seeking partnership before seeking your own soul path in Divine Union with Creation.

I'd imagine that it's very difficult for many to even imagine what I'm talking about here, because we're so engrained to submit, contort, shift, behave, quiet down, etc, in order to have safety, relationship, and even the basics.

I study energetics, and specifically the energetics of feminine and masculine, and the energetics of Sovereign Unity and the soul's Original Blueprint which is Unity itself.

I help people to re-map relationships and behaviors, but not to "get" any one thing in particular other than love, harmony, partnership, and a life aligned to Mother Father God and your purpose for being on Earth.

Your purpose for being on Earth may involve a relationship with a man and Divine Union, and I hope it does. But you don't need to bend and break for that kind of love. You need to be fully who you are.

If you're interested in this kind of life, consider joining Re*Source starting June 7, 2025.

We're re-templating the sovereign nature of Woman, where you get to be sovereign, resourced, on your truest path, partnered if you choose, and holistically prosperous.

No polarity or submission games needed.

No more compromising who you are or what you need just to experience a little attention from a man.

It gets to be way better than that.

Surrender to your Source Connection.